... and he’s starting at quarterback this week for Virginia Tech. Hmmm. I’ll have to look into that.

Anyway, Tech’s coaches have officially broken up with Sean Glennon as their starting quarterback (it’s not you, it’s us). I can’t tell you how many girls have dumped me by saying: “It’s not you, it’s my left guard.“

That brings to mind one of the best break-up scenes in cinematic history: the part in the 1998 classic “Dirty Work” when Norm MacDonald’s girlfriend throws all his clothes from their second-story apartment window. Later, MacDonald sees a fellow walking down the street wearing his Montreal Canadians jersey. When MacDonald tells the guy to give it back, the guy pulls it off, revealing his back to be carpeted with hair—much to MacDonald’s repulsion. Transcendent comedy.

Wait, you mean Taylor being named the starter didn’t make you think of a low-brow flick directed by Bob Saget? Oh.

Here’s my legit take on Quarterback Break-Up 2007 ...

Glennon, now The Jilted Lover, is a good quarterback. Taylor probably has better overall skills. Problem is, Glennon’s weakness were exposed by an offensive line that was more brutally inept than even the coaches probably imagined. That bad combination of slow feet and big men unable to block—it’s like putting ketchup on ice cream—resulted in Tech’s coaches pulling the plug on Glennon, despite the preseason pledges of Glennon being the quarterback—period.

But if they’re going to go with Taylor down the road, might as well start him now. Remember, this decision might have been even easier for the coaches if Marcus Vick hadn’t gotten himself booted from school after the 2005 season. Vick would have been a senior last season, which would have meant Glennon and Taylor (and maybe Ike Whitaker) competing for the job this preseason—with none of them having started a game.

Tech has had true freshmen play quarterback recently: Bryan Randall in 2001, Glennon in 2004. But according to Tech ...

The last true freshman to start at quarterback for Tech was Todd Greenwood in 1982. He enrolled at Tech in January of 1982 and went through spring practice before starting eight games that fall. The last true freshman who enrolled at Tech in the summer and went on to start that year at quarterback was Steve Casey, who started two games in 1978.

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DON’T BLAME GLENNON FOR BAYOU BUNGLE

Bottom line, gang: Glennon was not the reason Tech lost at LSU. The reason was the Hokies’ swinging-gate defense. Glennon could have thrown for 400 yards, and Tech still would have lost. Consider that a Bud Foster defense at Tech, in Foster’s 152-game reign, has never allowed as many yards as it did Saturday in a regulation game.

The 598 yards at LSU were the fifth-most allowed in The Beamer Era. (Foster became the defensive coordinator in 1995.) The top four ...

649, Maryland, 1993
617, Boston College, 1993
606, Rutgers, 1992
604, Syracuse, 2002 *triple overtime game

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CARR ON THE HOT SEAT?

No, not that Carr. I mean the Carr that can beat a Division I-AA team.

Another tough loss for coach Dale Carr and our San Angleo State Rams, gang. They lost to East Central Oklahoma 48-31 on Saturday, dropping them to 0-2 heading into their home opener this Saturday at San Angelo Stadium against Central Oklahoma. The Rams need to clamp down on defense. They made East Central quarterback Marcus Johnson look like John Elway, as he threw for 386 yards and six touchdowns, both school records.

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I’ll have more later on Beamer’s full comments from today’s teleconference. Heading to practice, where I hope to talk with Glennon and quarterbacks coach Mike O’Cain.